A List of Probably True Facts about Lists

  • In the early days of McSweeneys.net, God wrote an “Open Letter to Hedonistic Humans” post that was rejected until he re-submitted to the Lists section as “The Ten Commandments”
  • Martin Luther originally wrote 190 theses, but one of the sheets of paper blew away before he could nail it down
  • Woodrow Wilson’s “Fourteen Points” is 86 points short of the record set by Wilt Chamberlin
  • The Bill of Rights has a ten-day grace period
  • Song Magazine posts a weekly Top-100 top billboards in the country
  • Santa’s first list was the shortest:

Cain: Nice Naughty

Abel

  • My “shit list” is: solid, liquid, and just gas
  • And finally, from personal experience:

 

  • If you tell Amazon your wish-list, it won’t come true. It will just constantly remind you that you should have taken a job at your father’s firm instead of deciding to tell jokes at a laundromat every Tuesday following a full moon for six apathetic comedians and one overly-critical washing machine repairman
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